Does your partner:

- ignore your feelings?
 
- disrespect you?
 
- ridicule or insult you then tell you its a joke,
  or that you have no sense of humor?

- ridicule your beliefs, religion, race, heritage
  or class?
 
- withhold approval, appreciation or affection?
 
- give you the silent treatment?
 
- walk away without answering you?

- criticize you, call you names, yell at you?

- humiliate you privately or in public?

- roll his or her eyes when you talk?

- give you a hard time about socializing with your
  friends or family?

- make you socialize (and keep up appearances) even
  when you don't feel well?
 
- seem to make sure that what you really want is exactly
  what you won't get?
 
- tell you you are too sensitive?
 
- hurt you especially when you are down?
 
- seem energized by fighting, while fighting exhausts you?
 
- have unpredictable mood swings, alternating from good
  to bad for no apparent reason?
 
- present a wonderful face to the world and is well liked
  by outsiders?
 
- "twist" your words, somehow turning what you said
  against you?
 
- try to control decisions, money, even the way you style
  your hair or wear your clothes?
 
- complain about how badly you treat him or her?
 
- threaten to leave, or threaten to throw you out?

- say things that make you feel good, but do things
  that make you feel bad?
 
- ever left you stranded?
 
- ever threaten to hurt you or your family?

- ever hit or pushed you, even "accidentally"?
 
- seem to stir up trouble just when you seem to be
  getting closer to each other?
 
- abuse something you love: a pet, a child, an object?
 
- compliment you enough to keep you happy, yet criticize
  you enough to keep you insecure?
 
- promise to never do something hurtful again?
 
- harass you about imagined affairs?
 
- manipulate you with lies and contradictions?
 
- destroy furniture, punch holes in walls, break appliances?
 
- drive like a road-rage junkie?
 
- act immature and selfish, yet accuse you of those behaviors?
 
- question your every move and motive, somehow questioning
  your competence?
 
- interrupt you; hear but not really listen?
 
- make you feel like you can't win? damned if you do,
  damned if you don't?
 
- use drugs and/or alcohol involved? are things worse
  then?
 
- incite you to rage, which is "proof" that you are to
  blame?
 
- try to convince you he or she is "right," while you are
  "wrong?"
 
- frequently say things that are later denied or accuse you
  of misunderstanding?
 
- treat you like a sex object, or as though sex should
  be provided on demand regardless of how you feel? 


Your situation is critical if the following applies to you:

You express your opinions less and less freely.

You find yourself walking on eggshells, careful of when
and how to say something.

You long for that softer, more vulnerable part of your
partner to emerge.

You find yourself making excuses for your partner's behavior.
You feel emotionally unsafe.

You feel its somehow not OK to talk with others about
your relationship.

You hope things will change...especially through your
love and understanding.
 
You find yourself doubting your memory or sense of
reality. 

You doubt your own judgment.
 
You doubt your abilities.

You feel vulnerable and insecure.
 
You are becoming increasingly depressed.
 
You feel increasingly trapped and powerless.

You have been or are afraid of your partner.
 
Your partner has physically hurt you, even once. 

Is Your Relationship Abusive?
Patricia Jones, M.A.
If you would like advice or counseling from Patricia Jones there are three methods that you may choose from:

1.) Long Question For a fee of $45.00.
       A long question should contain background information and list any concerns or                        questions that you have about a particular issue or issues. It may be as long as
       you wish. I will reply back to you via email with an extensive response ( several                          pages in length ) within 24 to 48 hours. See an example of a Long Question here.

  2.)  A Short QuestionFor a fee of $25.00.  A short question should give some                       background information and ask one question about one particular issue that you may             have. I will reply back to you via email within 24 to 48 hours.
      See an example of a Short Question here.

3.) Telephone counseling sessions. Please read here for instructions on                                  receiving Telephone Counseling   Telephone Counseling Instructions.
For Help and Advice
Telephone Counseling  OR  Email a Question
Are you in an Abusive Relationship?
Answer the questions below to see if you are being abused. If you answer Yes to more than just a few of them you are in an Abusive Relationship
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